Sunday, June 23, 2013

Guad: First Love


I didn't drink coffee until I started college at UT.  At first I drank the weak dormitory brew, which I so inundated with flavored creamers and sugar that it barely qualified as coffee.  But never mind that.  It caffeinated me through late night essays and somehow validated my status as a university student.

Post dorm life, my stimulant-riddled study habits compelled me to find a coffee shop I could call home.  Honestly, the idea of it was intimidating for this still-new-to-Austin girl.  I imagined having to sip espresso (what's that?) made by a barista (what's that?) over philosophical conversations with a niche of academics using words I'd never heard.  I did not feel at all qualified to belong to such a scene.  But I still needed coffee and a place outside my sleepy apartment to study, so I was going to have to embrace what we now call...coffee culture.

Naturally, I chose the place where all my friends went: Metro.  It was a 24hr-edgy-grungy-spacious coffee bar on the Drag, chock full of character and characters.  The business originally opened as Insomnia in the early 90's, but changed over to Metro Espresso Bar a couple of years later.  And despite the volatile retail market that forced out many local businesses on the Drag, Metro hung in there steadily serving the communities around UT for more than a decade.



There was something raw and visceral about the space.  Towering brick walls, exposed steel beams and torturously geometric chairs gave you a sense of being simultaneously welcomed and accosted.  Nights at Metro were frenetic and pulsating in a sleep-deprivation-meets-Paul-Oakenfold+a-quad-shot-latte kind of way.  Weekends were languid and introspective in a Mazzy Star kind of way. I preferred the Ben Harper/Bjork mid-afternoons with a too-sweet iced chai latte. But atmospheric preferences aside, one thing was for sure: a haze of cheap cigarette smoke pervaded every conversation and every page of every book.  For, during my turn-of-the-century era at Metro, people still smoked in doors and (for the most part) read from books and wrote on paper.

Metro Espresso Bar, Spring 2008

And read I did.  Spent hours reading and drafting essays sustained in part by the sheer energy of the place.  I can honestly say I was far more academically productive there than at the library where I immediately fell asleep or at my apartment where I studied the fridge and the Food Network.  After my school days and even now, I do some of my best writing there.  But that is only half of why I made Metro my coffee home.  I also went because of the people.

Thank goodness my stereotype of coffee shop cliques was mostly unfounded.  Certainly there were a few intimidating regulars much smarter and more loquacious than I.  But most regulars were students in need of a social living room just like me.  All kinds of young people set-up camp in Metro, which produced a steady stream of dynamic conversation.  There were passionate discussions, heated debates and outright arguments fueled by youth and ferocious appetites for truth.  Perhaps I'm romanticizing a bit here.   But as I remember it, the essence of what happened through conversations at Metro was nothing short of formative.

I loved Metro.  The coffee was college-student-passable. The espresso Rocket Shake was to die for.  The baristas were endearingly disgruntled.  I am thankful for that dirty-brilliant coffee dive with ever-open doors because it was there that I first came to love coffee culture.  And what's more, the people I came to know during that season of life are unforgettable.  Especially one...



Tuesday, May 21, 2013

not so much

"It was like a crumpled piece of paper under a thousand books."

This afternoon was hard. 


Elia cried. 
I cried.
Might have even made some other mamas cry.
Michael was the safe place in the midst of our insecurity.

In the end we learned some things about ourselves and each other,
which is good
and hard.

Thursday, May 9, 2013

...behind...

I am so behind on blogging.  There are a load of things I wish to share, record and blog about because there is so much going on in our world.  But life with a newborn does not included a lot of two-handed time.  Hours of nursing provides ample time for composing posts but little time (or energy) for actually typing them.  What to do...?...

I may try blogging from my phone--shorter snippets of daily life as opposed to the lengthy photo-stories I usually share.  May work, may not. But let's give it ago!

Hazel's first visit to Medici on West Lynn


Hazel's first visit to Medici downtown


Thursday, April 11, 2013

To the Secret One soon to be revealed...

Dear Hazel,

Today, April 11th, is your due date.  But we will see when you actually get here.

To tell you the truth, I'm glad you did not come early.  The many events (some good, some hard, some sad) in the last few weeks would have competed for attention with your arrival.  But all that is mostly resolved and most importantly, you now have my full attention.  My heart is devoted to anticipating your arrival; I am filled with joy.

It is the most perfect spring right now.  The weather is perfect: a nice mix of occasional rain, cool air and sunshine.  All the trees are new-leaf green.  Grass and flowers cover the open spaces.  Nature bursts forth on the earth trumpeting the new season.  It is indeed a time of looking forward and celebrating what is to come--what is just about to come.  And whatever it is, it will be glorious.  This new season will contain new expressions of God's glory.

This is your season!  You are part of all the life that is springing forth.  You are part of the glory God is birthing on earth right now.  One of my favorite passages in the bible says, "He determined the times set for us and the exact places we should live."  Springtime in Austin, Tx was the time and place set for you.  Why this time and space was chosen for you is a mystery that will be revealed to you throughout a lifetime.  But without a doubt, your timing is wrought with divine purpose and joy.

Oh sweet daughter!  I cannot wait to hold you and gaze upon you and marvel at all that you are.  We can't wait to call you by name and welcome your beautiful self into this world.  But me and your father are not the only ones...a whole family awaits you!  Three sisters and a brother eagerly look for your arrival; they are so curious to know the next member of the V Force.  All of us love you, so much, already.  Indeed, you have been hugged, kissed, whispered and sung to, prayed over and blessed for nine months now.  Though in ways unseen, you are well woven into the fabric of our family.  And now,  your particular pattern is about to be unveiled!

We will see you soon Miss Hazel Lee.

With love,
Mom



Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Stars align

Austin made constellations at school. This is the Big Dipper and The Jesus Cross.



Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Austin the Magnificent

Austin grew up so much this past year.  But to tell you the truth, I often sense that inside the mind and heart of our little boy is full grown character from some epic tale that has already lived epic adventures and traveled the world over.  It's as if there's an ancient sage trapped in a little boy's body patiently waiting for the size, skills and faculties to properly tell his story.  When he was born his Aunt Jana looked at him and said, "Those feet have already been places."  I think it's true.



Thus, it is so exciting to watch him grow and learn and begin to express his inner self  in new ways.  Here are a few of the attributes I've seen emerge this past year....


STEADY LEARNER
This time last year, Austin was in preschool.  He did not love the academia but did love playing with a room full of little boys all day.  Apparently, they loved him too.  According to his teacher, Mrs. Patsy, the other boys would fight over who got play with Austin and vie for position as "Austin's best friend." Yet, through it all, Austin never showed favoritism and instead played calmly with them all throughout the year.  A year which culminated with a preschool graduation ceremony through which the typically crowd-hating Austin marched proudly and confidently!

However, starting Kindergarten was something else all together.  The first day was one of the hardest for him (and me).  It took weeks of meltdowns at home and at school before things normalized.  One day he said to me, "Mom, I don't want to go.  I just miss you toooo much!"  I'm sure you can imagine my near heart failure.  BUT as we expected, he soon came to love school.  Once he was confident in the routine, environment and came to trust his beloved teacher Ms. Lampman, we started to see him truly enjoy using the new skills he was learning at school like doing science experiments and writing stories!!




CLEVER BUILDER
This part is not new.  He has been making cool stuff ever since his little hands could stack one thing on another.  Building is definitely one of his outlets for creative expression, and it is fun to watch his creations become more intricate as his academic skills increase.  This is typified (as any mom of a 5-yr-old boy will tell you) by the foray into Legos...





BRAVE ADVENTURER
Okay, this one is not so new either.  But this year he had the opportunity to explore new lands and use new tools that are essential to the spirit of adventure. Running wild in the Redwoods, hiking for miles to discover a black sand beach, wrestling waves and for sand for hours--those experiences are soaked into his bones and will not be forgotten.  Building fires, wielding a pocket knife and learning to bear the responsibility of both--that's new.










MIGHTY WARRIOR
He is a warrior and a fiery one at that.  I love it.  For now, he is the victorious hero of imaginary battles in which he uses his strength and cunning to combat any "bad guy" who would dare obscure his path.  I will not discourage such wiles of his imagination.  Because I believe they are good practice.  I believe he is destined to be a leader.  I believe he is destined to use his strength and his imagination to combat the real woes of our age.   There is a Victorious Hero within him, and I always want him to believe that.





TENDER CHILD
Yet for all the epic-ness about him, he is still our sweet tender boy.  His heart is full of love, innocence and purity.  He still adores his stuffed animals, is unabashed about kissing us or holding our hand and clings to us when he's scared.   I know that these childhood sweetnesses will soon be replaced by some kind of older-kid awesomeness, but for now I cherish him just as he is.










Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Birthday Boy

Birthday breakfast....
Waffles with syrup, strawberries, whip cream and sprinkles alongside a flaming sword cookie.


The first thing he said about the cookie was, "Oooo Mom! I like the flames!"
The next thing he said about the cookie was, "Hey look!  If you turn it upside down there's a heart!"

Those two observations say a lot about his nature.

More on that soon....